just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
This is the high leading the old right now
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
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Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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