If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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