okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
