ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
