I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
