yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
