If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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