why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
