Please, let me fuck your mom
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?