What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
ttyl tear gas
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
BRING THE BAGELS
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
