turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
she pinky promised me she was 18
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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