If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
