Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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