all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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