Those balls look pretty dangerous.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Alive.
So much puke
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
