Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
