Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
