Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
