your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
