He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
