Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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