do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
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