he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
