that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
