I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
