Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
