Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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