i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize