I want to make a zoo with you.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Randomize
