Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
