he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Randomize