and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
