Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
