At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
