so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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