i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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