She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize