no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
