We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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