Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
