grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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