About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
