Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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