So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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