I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
