I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
