the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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