If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people are starting to question the shark bite story
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize