Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
