Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
