u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
splinters make it hard to masturbate
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize