Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
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As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
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So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.